October. and Hephzibah.

DANG..
Its November 1 already? well..... heres a pro-side, ill be 21 in less than 24 hours. :)

October was an insanely amazing month full of God's grace and provision. God was constantly showering me with love. He dropped $500 on me, i got to see my family, there were crazy things that were happening with family when they were here (free parking...), i recently found out that i can be put back on my dad's insurance (no more for me!), God basically paid my insurance this month, and ive had an interview for a new job (just praying that goes through), prophetic words that God was teaching me how to cook and write without lines and He is showing me color again... just amazing, little blessings here and there. just amazing.

on the flipside, God was also speaking to me alot about Hephzibah. not only was the scripture being randomly flipped open when i opened the Bible... it was this scripture:

Isaiah 62:4 (Amplified Bible)

4You [Judah] shall no more be termed Forsaken, nor shall your land be called Desolate any more. But you shall be called Hephzibah [My delight is in her], and your land be called Beulah [married]; for the Lord delights in you, and your land shall be married [owned and protected by the Lord].

BUT Then.... the wierd parts.... i would see the word EVERYWHERE.... in fact, just tonight at the Morningstar harvest fest a guy was reading as part of a prophetic word to another girl.... then my friend went to a Hephzibah house in NYC a couple weeks ago... my other friend Olivia wrote a blog on IHOPKC and i went to read it and the title was Hephzibah... just word after word after word. i love how that happens. i would look up in the room and that word would be on the wall, i would read a book and the word would be in the book. WHAT? really? honestly? HEPHZIBAH? but i mean, come on. it signifies something HUGE. His delight is in ME. HIS delight is in me. His DELIGHT is in me. His delight IS in me. His delight is IN me. His delight is in ME. WOW. DANG. when you really think about it, its powerful. its intense. its crazy to think about. HIS DELIGHT IS IN ME. I delight Him! i make him GIDDY with joy! HE cant contain himself! with who? me? wretched soul? really? yes! thats the amazing thing.and i say, "heck, no, God. Im so not worth your attention". and hes like "oh yea, ya are. really. you are. YOU ARE SAFE HERE. THIS PLACE IN MY HEART IS SAFE". i am learning about the safety of his heart, hes just not going to drop me after he finds something gross in my life.He's just gonna go after it, burn it, and move on. He just loves me that much. cause HE delights in me. i wrote that word on my arm in pen the other day, on my wrist. HEPHZIBAH. that was a very anointed day. God was all over that. I looked at it and saw the significance and i have a picture on my phone of it on my wrist.



amazing huh? its just mindboggling what it means and when we apply it...it just rocks my world. i love my Jesus. GOD, teach me how to love you even more. teach me how to be obsessed with you.

the words of this song are awesome but the tune is whacked so ill spare you and just share the lyrics:

Beckah Shae
Hebrew: Hephzibah (My delight is in you)
Isaiah 62

Lyrics:
So I woke up in the morning, with only one word on my mind.It was given to me in my sleep, and I knew I just had to find,The meaning, the answer,The reason for this mystery.Oh, and I knew it came from you,Cause I felt this overwhelming peace.
You said I am a Crown of Splendor!You said I am a Royal Diadem in your hand!
You’ve called me Hephzibah.You’ve called me Hephzibah.I’m no longer forsaken,Oh but to know! That you delight in me,And you call me Hephzibah.
So I was once desperately, insecure and desolate,With damaged dignity,In all my sins and faults and bruises.Trying to find my beauty, seemed impossible to me.Till you came and took my shame,And dressed me up in your Glory.
What magnificent exchange,You’ve adorned me with Your name.Your beauty for my sin.And here I stand not just forgiven,But dressed in royalty, as you rejoice over me,As a bridegroom for His bride.Now I can see you and how you really see me.

He is really taking me through an intense season of identity and healing right now just from stuff in the past that has held me back and the things in my heart that i or others have been set on me. i was with my housemate and two of her friends tonight at their house (ive been with them before..), and it just felt GOOD. God was like "go ahead, be YOURSELF and nothing less". it was just fun. we just watched a movie. but I felt at home. i dont know. God is just beautiful. Hes in a season right now of just restoring relationships and circumstances in my heart and in my life. its harvest in my heart and i can feel it. Jesus, you rock.